My old box.

An old friend of mine had recently blogged about going through his old stuff and I was inspired to dig up MY box of old stuff when I reached home in Singapore.

So when I got home tonight, I dug out the now dusty box that holds many of the nice stuff I’ve received from my friends in my schooling years. Dating as far back as 1988.

I found lots of stuff that I had forgotten I had. There was a old crumpled piece of paper with a birthday wish from my mates in junior college. And I found an old love letter from a guy who had a crush on me and he had drawn a cartoon looking picture of me! Hahaha..

The funny thing is, I felt the same way as my old friend about the old stuff. I felt detached. I felt like I was looking at the stuff of a different person, not of me. And I had a feeling of bittersweet in me.

It was sweet to be reminded that I had received so many well wishes and so many wonderful cards in my early years. I had friends that cared about me. But it was just as bitter because I realised that 70% of these people are no longer or barely in my life now.

Some of the things in this box are REALLY special. From people that I had cared heaps about. And from people whose encouragement I had thrived on as a young adult. All those “Pass It On” cards. Such tiny little cards, but filled with such warm meaningful words.

Opening my old box triggered a flood of memories and thoughts. I suddenly realised once again that friendships are incredibly fragile. People will walk in and out of our lives. And they may leave our friendship behind and cast a dark shadow over us, even when they once said they will cherish the friendship forever. But new people will walk into our lives and bring sunshine again.

I continue to believe in friendship. And my friends continue to sit on the same pedestal as my family. That’s because some of my friends have been stronger pillars in my life than my own family has been, and their unconditional support for me cannot be less important than my family’s.

To the friends who have left my life, broken my faith or lost my trust, I have moved on and have only regret that they have chosen to give up what we had shared. To the friends who are in my life and have stayed in it all these years, I love and cherish them and I will do my best to be as good a friend as I can be for them too.